Often, we read about people writing to their younger selves, sharing advice they wish they had known in their earlier years. This is done in the hopes that another younger person may read it & benefit from this sage advice. An attempt to somehow lessen the stress & self-doubt a younger person feels as they move forward in life.
This got me to thinking.
At the age of 54, based on my life experience to date, what advice would I deliver to myself in my senior years? If I had the chance to have a conversation with my older self, what nuggets of knowledge would I feel it necessary to share?
Hopefully one of my kids will have tucked this away in a safe place, waiting for the appropriate time to present me with my own words of advice. Lord knows, I won’t be able to find it anywhere & I…
Imagine a walk through a wooded area just after a rainstorm.
The paths differ, some are easy to navigate without any mud or puddles. Paths wide enough to pass easily maybe with the chance to catch the warmth of your sun of your face. These paths are the paths that we find the majority of our lives. We can use these paths and have company quite easily as we make our journey. Many types of friends and acquaintances can join us on these paths with ease.
Friendships that endure are with the friends that we walk down muddy narrow paths with. These paths are difficult and we choose friends who are not only prepared to walk these paths with us, but are also prepared to offer their hand to guide and steady us.
How about if we have a choice of paths. Perhaps we are at a junction and we can either take an easy path or a difficult one. Beware of a faux friend who will enjoy convincing us to take the narrow path with puddles of unknown depths..
We therefore have our fair-weather friends, our true friends and faux friends.
I want you to be able to think like me.
I would like you to see what I see.
The years, the mistakes and the times I got it right
Has revealed a calm and clarity of sight.
Happiness is fleeting and its appearances are unplanned
We feel its power and for it to stay is our demand.
A feeling of joy is so because of its lift.
To have constant life’s highs is an unachievable gift.
So put down your tech, don’t look at your phone
Write a list to fulfil your dreams, let your mind roam
If you had more time and money what is it that your heart desires
I don’t require a shopping list just a list to make you smile
Once you are skilled to nuture yourself
You will discover that you are the source of good health
As you grow in stature with illuminating content
you will attract the moments that may feel heaven sent.
We all have the same amount of hours in a day
Set yourself free, leave others to do what they may
Your life is precious and yours alone, don’t let others convince you to achieve half measures.
Be brave my darlings seek and and you will find your life pleasures.
I must admit approaching my 49th birthday is a little daunting. I feel very over weight, this morning I put my knickers on back to front and found out that they fit me better this way round, My belly is therefore bigger than my bottom, great.
After my birthday and Dad,s funeral which is to take place the day after my 49th birthday I vow to myself that I will strive for a better life. The greatest love, is to love yourself and all that.
I will join a slimming club….I know that without the fear of some stranger checking my weight once a week, is enough to say no to a cake. I will spend more time on myself, I will find a way to burst into my 50th birthday happier and in as good a state that I can manage in one year.
My mental health is a priority too. May I underline mental health is a totally different aspect to the mind than a mental illness. I think we should all work on and protect our mental health. Every single one of us has a mental health concern.
I have been concerned for a while over the impact on mental health and our use of social media. I know that at the moment I will not allow any photograph of me to reach my or close families news feeds. Instead I manage to check in ant fabulous places and show my hand holding a glass.
My dad is so poorly, my husband is having 3 monthly check ups to check for a reoccurance for skin cancer ( all clear, thankfully ) and I insist on telling the world through Facebook that I’m fine….look. I’m at a friends birthday party or at the theatre.
Right, here goes…..my life on social media will no longer exist. My account has been disabled. Its a good start, no more comparisons to deal with. No more little voice in my head saying…..I want what they have.
Mum and dad almost made it to their 60th Wedding anniversary. That is some achievement. Hubby and I have been married 28 years and I can’t imagine how it feels to be in a marriage thats twice as long. I don’t like leaving mum to lock up the house and go to bed on her own.
During dads illness I carried a little notebook with me every where. Each appointment had a neat heading and a brief summary of all that happens during the appointment. The book contains details of the ever changing medicines and the dose of each. I also have lists of contact details from doctors to pharmacies and cancer research help line. The book is my most precious possession.
I look at this book that has been on my kitchen table since I arrived home two days ago.
The book needs to go…..now. I take it down the garden with a box of matches in my other hand. Since dad passed away I seem to be doing things that are almost ritualistic. Bird feathers, talking to rainbows that seem to disappear into my home….now burning a manuscript of an illness.
I decide to carry on with whatever I feel needs to be done to get through this grief. I know dad would want me to be positive , wear bright colours and smile when I can.
During the small fire, a number of pages escape and dance around the garden. I watch the paper mingle with falling leaves. I stand up and focus on a beautiful copper beech leaf falling, twisting and changing its path. I begin a merry shuffle and manage to catch it mid air. I look up at the house and my son is watching me.
I smile and shout “caught it” with the leaf held aloft of my head. A reassurance to my darling son that its ok to carry on and live like his grandad would want us to.